Today at the bookstore, in front of me on the escalator was a beautiful little girl, about 5- years young, long wavy blond hair, sparkly green eyes, Hannah Montana purse – a splitting image of her mother who accompanied her. In her arms, hugged ever so tightly was Walt Disney’s big book of fairytale’s and anyone within eyeshot could glean from this little angel’s tight grip and kool-aid sized smile that she was overjoyed to be buying such a treasure-trove of fantastical stories. She marched up to the register and proudly placed the book on the counter. The little girl skipped out of the store swinging the bag excitedly telling her mommy which story she wanted her to read first… No surprise… Cinderella.
I started to wonder what the little cutie’s future dates and her eventual husband might be doing today. I started to wonder what messages of love were filling their little minds? What expectations were being planted? What dreams were being formed?
I called a friend, a mother of three little boys, “What are the boys up to today?” I asked. She replied, “One is at the skate park, one is learning how to Mexican wrestle at a neighbors house, and Tim is home sick so his father is using the opportunity to show him how to make a fart sound with his armpit.”
Hmmm… so clearly boys are not spending their Saturdays in training to become knights in shining armor the way little girls across the globe are all in princess boot camp - reading about princesses, dressing up as princesses, playing princess games, planning their princess weddings… filling their hearts and their minds with princess dreams.
And then the princesses grow up and we the princesses begin the pursuit of our perfect prince. We seek a perfectly coiffed man whose every word rolls off his tongue with pure poetry, every gesture feeling like a castle rescue, every moment as it was written in our flawless fairytales from our youth. And when the story goes off course… when he does or says the wrong thing, we crumble into devastated little princesses.
So often, we never give a guy real-life expectations – only storybook ones so they are destined to fail in our princess eyes, and as a result, we are destined to be disappointed. So the next time you go out with a guy, remember, he’s just a guy, not a prince. He doesn’t live in a beautiful castle with a staff of 100, nor ride a white horse so the toilet seat might be left up and he might be late on occasion. He wa sn’t drawn by an animator, which means he will have imperfect hair days and spots on his clothes sometimes. He doesn’t have a perfected script so he just might say the wrong thing once in awhile. Remember though, it is in imperfection that we find perfection… that’s called character… and that should be appreciated.
Just make sure he still treats you like the princess that you trained so hard to become ☺
Live and love largely, Tristan
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Waiting in line for a latte can be the ideal time to return a call or beat the next level of Brickbreaker and the idea of flying on a plane iPod-less sounds so 2001, but putting yourself in a technological bubble makes it hard for potential mandidates to break through to you. Buds in your ears or your pretty little face buried in a PDA not only makes it difficult for a guy to penetrate your tech zone, as purposefully or not, you are putting up a “do not disturb” sign. In a world filled with tech-obsessed busy bodies, being the antithesis to this is a refreshing sight to see, and a subtle invitation to guys. So the next time you’ve got some idle time, where sure, you could pound through a dozen emails, text your BFFs or get lost in your favorite new download, consider instead disconnecting from your techie gadgets and open up to connecting with a human hottie. I guarantee pushing a boys buttons will be more fun!
Cara makes this comment
Sunday, 14 February 2010